It’s them, but it’s also you

You know that one person who drives you crazy? Yeah, that one. 

 I’m guessing that you know at least one person who, for personal or professional reasons, you have to endure. It’s a strained relationship at best, and maybe it really is their fault, but if you are going to have to work, live, or play together then you … Read More

The business case for being a decent person

You don’t need a business case for being a decent person. Just be a decent person. You don’t need a business case for being trustworthy, kind, thankful, helpful, caring, or any of the other parts of being a decent person. If being a decent person is a professional liability…then it’s time to find a new profession.

The cost of procrastination

Yesterday I spent 10 minutes completing a project I’ve been putting off for 3 years. And it felt awesome. The thing they don’t tell you about procrastination is that the work you are putting off weighs on you. Bit by bit the projects that you will tackle “tomorrow” sap your ability to conceive new and even more wonderful work because … Read More

Alone versus lonely

Being alone and feeling lonely are two very different things. To be alone is to be physically separated from other people. I am here, you are there. To be lonely is to feel separated from other people regardless of proximity. I am here, you are here, but there is no connection. People can be very alone without ever feeling lonely…and … Read More

When in doubt, take unusually good care of people

You will find yourself at a crossroads at some point this week. In the coming days you will be faced with a choice between doing what is easy/expedient/personally advantageous and doing what is best for a spouse, a customer, a friend, or a perfect stranger in line at the grocery store. When faced with this choice you may be unsure … Read More

You can always opt-out

Many of us are so afraid of being excluded by others that we don’t recognize the benefit of choosing to exclude ourselves from things like toxic relationships, petty gossip, unhealthy romantic entanglements, guilt trips, and sketchy business deals. From what do you need to exclude yourself this week?

Thank you for making the bed

Today marks 18 years of marriage for my wife and I. It has been a wonderful, challenging, complicated, hilarious journey thus far and I wanted to share something I’ve learned in the past year that I hope will help you. It’s embarrassing that it took me more than 17 years to pick up on the following pattern, but most of … Read More

I don’t like myself when I’m around you

Well not YOU, but I contend most of us have, or have had, someone in our life who pushes our buttons and “makes” us think, feel, or act in ways we don’t like. Unfortunately, THEY aren’t really the problem. We get to choose with whom we associate…or at least how we react to the people with whom we must associate. … Read More

My wife knows the truth

A couple months ago I published a free ebook that has been downloaded thousands of times in countries all over the world. I still can’t believe it. Reading the kind messages from readers has been incredibly humbling because I struggle every day – with varying levels of success – to live out the ideas I hold dear. Whenever I am … Read More

Life is really, really short

Life is a short ride, my friend. Don’t presume that there is going to be more time to tell people how much you care about them. Don’t presume you can tell them their friendship, or their work, or their art is important to you tomorrow, because tomorrow isn’t promised to any of us. Send the text, fire off the e-mail, … Read More

The struggle is real

The struggle is not only real…the struggle is necessary. Scratching and clawing to overcome an obstacle that exists between you and something meaningful is part of what makes the end result so…meaningful. If it was easy, your unique skills and expertise wouldn’t be as valuable as they are. If it was easy, we wouldn’t need you. What if you stopped … Read More

You can’t win ’em all

You can’t win ’em all…so why do you expect you should? Baseball teams play 162 games a season and no team has ever gone 162-0. The general expectation is that every team will win 50 games, every team will lose 50 games, and it’s what teams do with the remaining 62 games that define them. You are going to face … Read More

Go ahead and ask

I have learned so much from the incredible people I have the good fortune of calling family, friends, and colleagues. To say that my work directly benefit from their wisdom is a huge understatement. I am indebted to each of these wise and generous people and the best way I know to pay them back is to extend their impact … Read More

Where’s the fun in doing what you’re told?

You don’t need permission to be a leader, you just have to lead. You don’t need to read a book, take a class, or convince someone to give you a microphone in order to lead, you just have to care enough to move first. I call this being the first domino to fall. The very best leadership lessons you will … Read More

It’s okay to not be okay

I really have to stop asking people if they are okay. Touching base with my friends by asking “are you okay?” is a great way to make them feel (even more) compelled to sugar coat their answer and pretend that things are better than they really are, because the answer is clearly supposed to be “yes.” Except I want the … Read More